Potty Training in Our House

A friend of mine asked me to write tips I have on potty training. I have been thinking about it and pulling ideas together in my head. At first I thought, I don't have any advice because it doesn't always happen when or how I would like it to. I have learned a few things about potty training though and I do have five who are potty trained. So, we've done something right.

Facts I have learned about potty training:
1. Girls train earlier than boys, sometimes as much as a year earlier in our case. Girls seem to care more about this sort of thing. They want to be grown up. Little boys are too busy playing to care or notice they have to go. Plus they really don't care much if they pee themselves. The girls don't like it so much.

My oldest daughter trained at just before 2 1/2. My middle son was torture to train and he didn't do it until he was 3 1/2.

2. They get it and it clicks when THEY are ready, not when when I am ready. Unfortunately, even after training lots, I forget this and try to pressure them to train. I so wish they would do it on demand and it would only take a week, but that has not been the way it has happened in our family. Each child is totally different, just as they are in everything and have trained differently. My most recent, youngest daughter, didn't even know what to do on the potty. She would sit on it all the time and say she peed. But, she didn't do anything. I left her be and didn't pressure her anymore and then a few months later I walked into the bathroom upstairs to find her pooping on the potty. From that point on, she figured it out and she did it. I loved it with her, because I always have found it easier to train for pee. This time, she was trained the other first.

3. Just as with any other tool for parenting, you will finds various opinions on how and when to potty train. Please remember that you are the parent. You know your child and your circumstances best. Don't feel pressured from others, do what it the best thing for your family.


Tips:
1. Buy lots of extra underwear, even old ones from garage sales or save hand-me-downs. Often one would poop in their underwear and it would gross me out so much (mostly I would have been pregnant) that I couldn't get myself to clean them out. I definitely wasn't about to slosh my hands around in the toilet to clean them. If I had old ones, I didn't feel bad about just throwing the they yucky ones in the garbage. This took a lot of pressure off me and has been so worth it.

2. BE PATIENT - they will get it eventually. Maybe not in your timing, but they will.

3. If it leads to stress on you and them - STOP! Try again in a few weeks or months. Sometimes, they just pick it up on their own without any pressure, like my daughter.

4. Don't feel pressured to have your kids potty trained by a certain age, because they are all different.

Hopefully, this has been helpful to someone. If you have a tip on potty training, leave a comment.

Observation

Today as I was sitting at the table with the boys doing their table-work, I noticed that my two year old daughter kept insisting on sitting on my lap. She really is good though and she likes to take the colored pencils and/or pens and draw on paper I give her and sometimes in her brother's books. As I thought about it more, I came to the realization that everyday when we are doing table-work, she is found in my lap. I wondered to myself, "why is she choosing to sit on my lap instead of being out playing, watching TV or getting into trouble?" As I thought about it, my thoughts took me back to this time last fall and even the previous spring. She would have been somewhere between 8-14 months old. When she woke up from her morning nap, she would sit on my lap while I worked with the boys on their table-work. She is doing it now, because that is what she remembers about school and thinks that is the best place to be. At times this irritates me a bit because it is more difficult to see around her and to write, but as I reflect on her little habit and the reasons she does it, I am very thankful that she desires to be close to me and it is a little bonding time for the two of us. That, and it keeps her out of trouble.